Repacking Bags

 

If you shop at Lidl,

You have three options:

1.      Load all your groceries back into the cart unbagged,

2.      Buy a reusable plastic or paper bag at the store,

3.      Or bring your own bags or coolers.

 

I opt for option three,

Unless I forget my own bags,

And then I go for option one or two.

 

While shopping, I like to carefully place items in my bags or cooler.

When self-checkout was an option,

It was easy to pick up the items,

Scan them,

And then place them back in their spot in the bag.

 

Self-checkout isn’t an option on Sunday mornings anymore,

So I now must go through the line with a cashier.

Oftentimes, the cashier haphazardly takes everything out of the bag and places it on the conveyer belt as quickly as possible,

Leaving me to repack what I had already packed—

But with the added pressure of someone being in line behind me.

 

Yesterday, as I was beginning to just unpack the bags,

Figuring that’s what would happen anyway,

The cashier said, “Oh. You don’t have to do that.

I’ll lift the items up and scan them and put them right back into the bag.”

Yay!

I was so grateful.

I wasn’t rushed or stressed and

We even had a nice talk about step ladders while she worked.

 

Sometimes, it’s the simplest things that

Make the biggest difference in someone’s day.

 

May we be a people of simple things,

Small things,

Gracious things,

That make life just a bit better for those around us.

Amen.

 

BINGO

 

This year’s fifth graders were COVID Kindergarteners. 

In March of what could arguably be called their most formative year of schooling, 

They went home on a Friday and then didn’t return to school until the next year.

When they did return in 1st grade,

They had their temperature taken each day,

They were required to wear masks,

They alternated between in person and virtual learning, 

And they stayed in their classrooms the entire year for all Encore classes.

I remember visiting their first grade classrooms and teaching them on the wide variety of screens 

And in a wide variety of classroom set ups. 

 

For years, this year‘s fifth graders struggled with behavior and social skills because of their bumpy start.

Truth be told, they will probably always be affected by those Covid years.

Yet I’m happy to report that something has happened this year

And they, for the most part, have become enjoyable to teach!

 

And so, to celebrate our six years of ups and downs together, 

I am asking my fifth grade classes to remember anything they’ve ever done in music class.

If possible, I am then letting them do that song or activity.

 

It’s kind of surreal,

Watching and hearing these kids who are as tall as me

Sing songs from that stunted kindergarten year with such happiness and enthusiasm that it genuinely makes me smile.

I was quite amused on Monday

When my class requested BINGO and then all but yelled the song because they were so happy to be singing it.

 

I often wonder what I’m doing teaching music.

I often wonder if what I am doing is making a lasting difference.

Hearing those fifth graders recall songs and activities that they did during two of the most wonky years of our collective existence

Made me realize something:

I am helping lay the foundation to the soundtrack of my students lives.

The music I choose imbeds itself in their little brains and becomes a strange part of the nostalgia of their childhood.

I am helping kids be kids in a society that wants to grow kids up too quickly.

And for that,

For BINGO and the Freeze Dance and the Bear Hunt, 

I am grateful.

 

Love

 

On Saturday night, 

A friend sent me this quote:

 

Even if a unity of faith is not possible, a unity of love is. —Hans Urs von Balthasar

 

On Sunday morning, 

My dad read 1 Corinthians 13. 

 

As Christ followers,

We are called to live in unity with one another.

And yet we disagree on 

Church polity,

Doctrine,

Theology,

Morals and values, 

Scripture interpretation,

And more. 

 

But Jesus is clear in the gospels and

Paul is clear in his letter to the Corinthians

That love is the greatest thing that we can hold.

And Paul takes it a step further and 

Gives us a clear definition of love 

That doesn’t take much interpretation. 

 

I think that sometimes we become so familiar with scripture 

That we don’t really hear it. 

I heard it yesterday. 

And it was a powerful reminder of 

Who I am tasked to be, 

Especially during these last few weeks of school. 

 

May you hear it, too, 

Even if you’ve read it 100 times, 

And may you remember:

 

“Even if a unity of faith is not possible, a unity of love is.”

 

Amen. 

 

——

 

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, 

But do not have love, 

I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 

 

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, 

And if I have a faith that can move mountains, 

But do not have love, 

I am nothing. 

 

If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, 

But do not have love, 

I gain nothing.

 

Love is patient, 

Love is kind. 

It does not envy, 

It does not boast, 

It is not proud.

It does not dishonor others, 

It is not self-seeking, 

It is not easily angered, 

It keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 

It always protects, 

Always trusts, 

Always hopes, 

Always perseveres.

 

Love never fails. 

But where there are prophecies, they will cease; 

Where there are tongues, they will be stilled; Where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 

But when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 

 

When I was a child, 

I talked like a child, 

I thought like a child, 

I reasoned like a child. 

When I grew up,

I put the ways of childhood behind me. 

 

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; 

Then we shall see face to face. 

Now I know in part; 

Then I shall know fully, 

Even as I am fully known.

 

And now these three remain: 

faith, hope and love. 

But the greatest of these is love.

 

Amen. 

Graduation Dreams

 

I often dream that I’m not going to graduate from college. 

All of my friends are going to graduate 

But I’m not going to get my degree  

Because I either didn’t go to a class for an entire semester

Or I didn’t do the class projects because I was too anxious or depressed. 

I don’t know why I dream this as often as I do. 

I’m sure someone can interpret the dreams. 

But I think it’s interesting that the dreams are tied to my anxiety

Because my anxiety disorder was not diagnosed

Until well after college. 

 

Tomorrow marks my 26th college graduation anniversary. 

I’m happy that I WAS able to walk the stage with my friends 

And that I graduated with highest honors. 

But, looking back, I can see definite times when my anxiety was out of control. 

Instead of making me skip class, 

My anxiety made me go to every class. 

Early. 

And instead of not doing class projects, 

My anxiety made me spend hours on them, attempting to achieve perfection. 

I can remember my chest getting tight and me feeling like I couldn’t breathe during band and chorus performances. 

At the time, I didn’t know that I was having minor panic attacks;

I just feared that feeling and hoped it wouldn’t happen. 

And I can remember fearing that the people in my life were going to die, 

Which is one of the ways that the anxiety disorder manifests itself in my life.

 

May is Mental Health Awareness month, 

Yet I am one of many who is very aware of her mental health every day. 

If you don’t deal with 

Generalized anxiety disorder, 

Major depressive disorder,

Bipolar disorder, 

Disordered eating, 

Personality disorders,

Obsessive compulsive disorder,

Panic disorder, 

Agoraphobia, 

Or any other of the many mental health issues 

Be thankful. 

If you do,

Know that you’re not alone. 

 

I’m thankful for people in my life who have helped me succeed. 

My professors in college, divinity school, and graduate school

Were gracious to me and wanted me to flourish.

I don’t know if they were concerned about my anxiety level or

If they just thought I was an overachiever. 

Either way, they helped me learn and grow 

Until I could name my anxiety and begin to deal with it. 

 

May WE support and help out one another 

In ways that are healthy, 

Especially when mental health is concerned. 

 

Amen. 

 

 

Emergency Lights

 

I went to Lidl yesterday per my normal Sunday morning routine, 

Only the trip wasn’t normal because 

The lights were out! 

As I rounded the corner to go inside, 

I hesitated,

Wondering if they were even open, 

Until I saw the sign that said,

“Lighting issue. We are aware and working on it.”

And so I went in to shop. 

Only the emergency lights were on,

Not the fluorescent overheads that usually light the store, 

And yet there was just enough light to see. 

 

Life is difficult. 

Real people have real problems that are not easily solved 

And the world seems dark: 

Sickness and disease. 

Divorce and single parenting. 

Eating disorders and mental health issues. 

Economic hardship and job insecurity. 

Political and racial tensions. 

Death and dying. 

Being trapped and feeling resentment. 

The darkness is real. 

But so is the light. 

 

It may not be a fluorescent light that makes everything bright, 

But an emergency light is always shining 

And providing just enough light to see. 

A smile. 

A hug.

A cardinal. 

A rainbow. 

A meal paid for in the drive thru. 

A check received in the mail. 

A text. 

A phone call. 

A letter in the mail. 

A visit from a friend.

 

May we be a people aware of lighting issues 

In the lives of those around us, 

And may we work on them

Through our very presence, 

Grounded in emergency light 

And love. 

 

Amen. 

Do The Work

It’s okay to like 

State more than Carolina. 

It’s okay to like 

Brussels sprouts more than broccoli. 

It’s even okay to not like broccoli at all. 

 

Opinions don’t matter on things that 

Ultimately don’t matter 

But 

Opinions do matter in things that 

Deal with the dignity of human life. 

 

White is not better than black or brown,

Male not better than female,

Straight not better than gay,

American not better than any other nationality,

Neurotypical not better than neurodivergent, and 

Able bodied not better than non able bodied. 

 

Some afford privilege, yes. 

But privilege does not mean 

Better than. 

 

And to stand in harsh judgment of,

Demean, 

Or treat poorly 

Persons fundamentally born different

Is not okay. 

 

It’s not easy overcoming stereotypes. 

It’s not easy examining prejudice and admitting where you are wrong. 

But common humanity challenges us to do the work. 

And it just might be life’s highest call. 

 

Oh God,

Help us to know the difference between

Harmless opinion and 

Harmful belief. 

Help us to examine ourselves 

And to see where we need to grow. 

And then help us to do the work 

Of letting go. 

 

Amen.