The Waiting

So I’m back in the place where these twice-weekly notes began.
I’m back in the place that seems like a distant reality.
Sometimes I wonder if my time here even happened.
The years came and went so quickly.
Goals realized. Dreams shattered. Purpose redirected. Life forever changed.
It’s been three years since I made the journey back North from South.
It’s been three years since I truly began to actively wait.

I went to the NC Zoo on Tuesday.
On Saturday, I’ll go to Riverbanks on Columbia.
I spent a lot of time with the otter and the bears on Tuesday.
I’ll spend a lot of time with the elephants, siamongs, and bears on Saturday.
I love watching the bears.
I love standing there waiting—
For them to open their eyes, to yawn, to stretch, to scratch, to walk, to swim, to play, to eat.
I love observing their fierce beauty and imagining how it would feel to hug them.
I love seeing children get super excited and adults put words to how the bears must be feeling.
And I love standing there longing than anyone else—
Knowing that the people who stop for only a minute are missing out on the fullness of what they would see—
If they would just wait.

In today’s society, very few of us like to wait.
We want everything and we want it now.
We expect food, results, internet connections, and answers instantaneously and when they don’t come instantaneously we complain.
And yet…
So much of life is in the waiting.
And so much of life’s beauty and lessons are in the same.

When I stand and watch the bears,
Waiting,
I’m not wasting time.
I’m actively observing, paying attention to what’s going on, knowing that more is to come, but okay if nothing different happens than the experience itself.

When I try to discern purpose and call or to dream new dreams,
Waiting,
I’m not wasting time.
I’m actively teaching, giving everything I have to where I am, believing that there may be something different to come, but okay if I’m led nowhere other than to where life catapulted me three years ago.

So I’ll keep on waiting
With the bears and my students and my family and my friends
And I’ll keep on singing with all that I am.
I’ll keep on watching one moment fade into the next
And I’ll keep on praying that God will make God’s presence known.
Goals realized. Dreams shattered. Purpose redirected. Lives changed.
It all happens in the waiting.
From North to South and back again.

Eels and Koalas and Polars, Oh My

Last week, I asked the question: What’s the ugliest or oddest animal you’ve ever seen? Armadillo. Opossum. Anteater. Roach. Nutria. Blue footed boobies…Those were some of the answers I received. As for me, one of the oddest animals I’ve ever seen is the baboon. I’ve always wondered why their bottoms are so big and red! :-)

My office is located on the same exit as Riverbanks Zoo. Because it’s so close, I decided to purchase a zoo membership and to visit the zoo as often as I can. When I go to Riverbanks, I like to visit the Brown Bears and hope that they’ll go swimming while I watch. I like to visit the Koala bears and watch them sleep. I like to visit the snakes because I feel as if cringing at their presence makes me stronger. And I like to visit the Sea Garden Eels because they make me laugh. The eels in the picture that I’m posting today are out way further than the ones at Riverbank have ever been. To me, they look like the little worm in Richard Scarry books, and they make me laugh as they poke out their heads and look around, stretching and reaching and exploring…but immediately retreating back into their holes if they hear a noise or sense a threat. I wonder if they ever get tired of their little holes and move or if they just stay in one place for their whole lives—popping their heads out and thinking about the tank around them but being too afraid to move.

Sunday, before returning to South Carolina after leading worship in North Carolina, I decided to visit the North Carolina Zoological Park in Asheboro with some friends. I had been to the NC Zoo before but I hadn’t been in awhile. The NC Zoo is HUGE! But because we went during late afternoon, many of the animals weren’t out. Even so, it was still neat to walk around and to see the natural beauty of that part of NC and to observe the plants and flowers that never hide from their onlookers.

My very, very favorite part of Sunday's zoo trip, though, made missing so many other animals worth it: I got to watch the Polar Bear swim…and then I got to see him walking around after! I realize that Polar Bears are probably very dangerous, but if I could have gotten into the water and played with Mr. Polar Bear, then I would have done it. He looked so soft and fluffy and happy and playful that I just wanted to squeeze him. And he was so big! And his swimming and treading water motions were so human. And I was so extremely fascinated by his beauty that all I could do was stand and watch and prevent small children from taking my place. I know. That was not kind. But that’s how enthralled I was by the whole scene.

Sometimes it amazes me to think that the same God who created armadillos and roaches also created sea garden eels and bears…and me. But God did. Our God of amazing creativity is a God with both a sense of humor and a deep, deep appreciation for beauty. And today, as I reflect on my experiences at the zoo that is home to the funny eels and the one that has a cold pool for a polar bear, I am humbly grateful that I am part of God’s creation and that I get to share this earth with fascinating plants and creatures. What about you?