Bearing Witness

 

Eleven years ago,

On a Wednesday night,

In a hospital room at Wake Med,

I unofficially officiated my first wedding.

The bride-to-be’s mom had had a massive stroke the Sunday before and was on life support.

She was not going to recover.

The family had made the decision to take her off life support that night,

But before they did,

The couple wanted to be married so that the bride’s mom could be there.

I took my guitar and my Book of Common Prayer to the small little room in ICU.

Standing at the foot of the mother’s bed,

I sang a song,

Guided the couple through their vows,

And pronounced them husband and wife.

There were tears:

My tears, the family’s tears, the nurses’ tears.

It was a beautiful moment,

And it was so very real…

Even though there was no license and no way to declare the ceremony legally binding.

 

Yesterday,

On Palm Sunday,

At a beautiful outdoor venue with the sun shining down,

I officiated another wedding.

The couple was having a hard time finding an officiant,

So a friend recommended me.

I exchanged e-mails with the bride-to-be a handful of times.

I sent a copy of the ceremony for approval.

I met the bride and the groom at the rehearsal on Friday.

I showed up for the wedding yesterday,

Held the groom’s ring on my pointer finger and the bride’s ring on the tip of my pinky finger,

Guided the couple through their vows, and

Pronounced them husband and wife.

There were claps and smiles and tears all around.

It was a beautiful moment.

And it was so very real…

Right down to the signing of the marriage certificate that made everything legally binding.

 

As a Reverend Music Teacher,

Ordained into the gospel ministry

But living out my call in the public schools,

I have the privilege of bearing witness to a lot of life’s beautifully, vulnerable moments.

From the classroom to performances to weddings to funerals,

When families look at me and say, “Thank you,”

I get to respond truthfully, “It was my honor to be here.”

And it IS an honor

To get to walk alongside persons on their journeys

And to represent the presence of God in real and tangible ways.

 

Dear God: Help each of us, in the ways we are gifted, to walk alongside others and to represent You in real and tangible ways. Help us to show up for one another and to do the work of Love…legally binding or not. Amen.

Keep Writing

 

Last night, as I was leaving the Food Lion parking lot with my window rolled down,

I heard someone say, "Hey, Miss Deanna."

Surprised to hear my name and see a familiar face, I said, "Oh! Hey!”

The friendly voice then said, “Keep writing!"

I said I'd try.

Then I thought to myself, 

"We had less than twenty seconds to talk.

We hadn't seen each other in months.

She could have asked about my parents,

Or how I was doing,

Or told me she missed me. 

But she chose to tell me to keep writing.

That's pretty amazing."

And so, I keep writing.

Even when I don't have much to say.

 

Like today.

 

My mom sent me to the Hallmark store on Saturday.

I hadn't been in months because 

Going to the Hallmark store is dangerous business

If I want to live within my means.

It's especially dangerous when I need to spend a certain amount of money

To get something free.

Let's just say that I accomplished my goal. Plus some.

I got my free stuff. Plus some.

And I picked up some really good gifts along the way.

I'd like to say that they were Christmas gifts, 

But I couldn't wait to give them so I gave them that day.

All three friends were very excited about their gifts,

Especially the friend with whom I did “Disney In A Day” last year.

I hadn’t seen her smile so genuinely in quite some time.

It’s always good to see people smile,

Especially when you know that you care enough to send (give) the very best.

(Thanks, Hallmark). 

 

See. I don’t have much to say.

 

Standing on duty this morning, 

The PE teacher burst into song, 

"The stars at night shine big and bright,

*clap, clap, clap, clap*

Deep in the heart of Texas!"

All day, 

Underneath Native American music,

And music about pumpkins and turkeys,

I've been singing, 

"The stars at night shine big and bright,

*clap, clap, clap, clap*

Deep in the heart of Texas!"

 

And now you're singing it, too.

You're welcome. 

 

The End 😊.

 

-----

 

When is the last time someone said something that meant a lot to you?

 

What store must you avoid lest you spent your entire paycheck?

 

When is the last time you spent a lot of money just to get something free? Or that you bought a gift that you couldn’t wait to give so you gave it early?

 

What is the last earworm that you had stuck in your head?

 

Please share! I’d love to know.

 

“Deep in the heart of Texas!” *clap, clap, clap, clap*

 

😊

 

Help To Survive

I’ve been to a lot of weddings, but I’ve never been a bridesmaid—
Which is fine because I’ve not had to buy a lot of one-time-wear-only dresses—
Instead I’ve been a musician—
Which is fine, too, because I’ve not had to stand in front of everyone while trying to hide my inevitable tears of beauty and joy.

This past weekend, however, I think I may have been close to being a bridesmaid.

I, the trumpeter, had the privilege of spending a lot of time with the bride.
As the only non-family member and non-parent hanging around the mountain house—
The wedding was atop Appalachian Ski Mountain and very beautiful—
I got to be the errand-runner, emergency fire-putter-outer, picture-taker, dog-walker, dog-sitter, bride-dresser, bride-chauffer, bride-whisperer…
And it was pretty cool.

But here’s the coolest part.

As part of the wedding ceremony during which I heralded the bride’s arrival,
The bride and groom did something I’d never seen.
Instead of
Lighting a unity candle,
Mixing salt or sand, or
Sharing their first communion—
All of which are beautiful symbols of marriage—
They planted a vine together.
They each had a vase of soil from their family farms,
Brought down the aisle by their parents,
That they mixed together to plant a fragrant vine,
The Stephanotis Vine—
That they will tend to and grow,
Just as they must tend to and grow their marriage.

Both need
food and water,
light and air,
space to flourish, and
room to mature.

Both take
time,
faith,
pruning, and
mess.

Both
Need
Love.

Steady love.
Intentional love.
Sacrificial love.
Determined love.

Both need help beyond themselves to survive.

…Family and friends,
Bridesmaids and Grooms-people,
Trumpeters and four-legged children,
The thoughts and prayers of those who looked on as
God blessed and literally watered the vine being planted by
Hands joined together in love…

The stephanotis vine and the newly married couple
Both need help beyond themselves to survive.

We do, too, friends.

And I consider it a privilege to do my part—
Even if it means buying a dress.