Dad's Surgery

Two weeks ago,

As a result of a scheduled scan,

My dad learned that he had a large

Aortic aneurysm

That would need surgery.

 

His surgery is scheduled for tomorrow.

 

If all goes well,

The procedure will be laparoscopic,

He will only be in the hospital for one night,

And the recovery process will be a few weeks.

 

We are praying that all goes well,

But we are aware how precarious surgery is at 82.5 years old. 

 

To say that things have been tense around the house is an understatement. 

As much faith as he has,

As much as he’s certain of eternity, 

As much as he believes in and trusts his doctors, 

My dad is still stressed, 

Being able to do nothing to fix himself

In the waiting, 

Worrying about what is to come, 

Not because of doubt in God 

But because he’s human and 

This is a big deal and 

Being put to sleep for surgery 

Causes one to face one’s own mortality. 

 

We have no idea how long he has had the aneurysm. 

It has evidently been getting larger for quite some time. 

Without knowing it,

My dad has been walking around with a ticking time bomb that could have exploded within the year.  

So we are thankful that one thing led to another led to another that led to this diagnosis. 

And we are thankful that it can be repaired. 

 

But we are rightfully anxious and 

Open to all the warm thoughts, prayers, and well-wishes that we receive. 

 

I don’t know how prayer works. 

But something about knowing

That a community of people, 

Focused on something greater than self, 

Is coming together in common thought and desire 

Is a powerful thing. 

 

So here’s to hoping for a successful surgery and recovery

And that my dad comes out of what he has compared to going to the repair shop 

As good as new. 

 

Amen. 

  

Stay the Course

 

One of my favorite games is Phase Ten Dice. 

It’s a cross between Phase Ten and Yahtzee 

And it is a combination of luck and strategy,

Although it could be argued it’s less strategy than luck. 

 

As the name suggests, 

There are ten phases that you must complete in three rolls each. 

You are rolling for a high score but

If a high score isn’t possible then you at least want to complete the phase.  

If you do not complete the phase, then you must try again and again until the phase is complete.

There is a 40 point bonus for finishing first. 

 

Time and time again, 

When playing Phase Ten Dice,

The person winning in the beginning is not the person who wins in the end. 

They will be sailing along, 

Completing phases, 

Getting high scores, 

And then come to a screeching halt when a phase trips them up. 

For my dad,

It’s seven of one color. 

It gets him every time! 

For me and my mom,

It can be anything.  

 

The point is,

You must stay the course. 

If you’re losing,

You cannot give up hope.

If you’re winning,

You cannot take your fortune for granted.

 

The game can drastically change in just one phase. 

 

You are not completely guaranteed a win or a loss until the game truly ends. 

 

So stay the course, dear friends—

Hunker down and persevere,

Even when hope is hard to come by. 

You never know when strategy and luck will converge to propel you forward, 

Out of whatever sadness and defeat you are feeling. 

 

As much as you can,

Enjoy the journey and

Share laughter with those you’re journeying with. 

Winning is nice, yes. 

But it’s the process that matters. 

And the process takes time.

And waiting.

And cheering one another on. 

 

Amen. 

Mimi

Salmon patties. 

That’s what I remember most about Mimi. 

Salmon patties and hummingbirds and talking really loud so she might hear. 

MiMi was Angela My Best Friend From

College’s grandmother. 

She died last Sunday at the age of 98. 

We celebrated her life on Saturday, 

And I walked away from the celebration with one burning question:

What can people learn about me from excavating my Bible? 

 

Mimi was a woman of faith.

Her theology was progressive and she supported women as pastors in Baptist life before it was a thing. 

She studied theology and read biblical commentaries simply because she wanted to.

She started an intergenerational Bible study at her church that outgrew all Sunday School rooms and had to meet in the sanctuary. 

Mimi was a student of the Bible and she evidently left clues in her Bible as to what made her tick. 

 

She underlined.

She wrote quotes. 

She stored poems. 

She shared wisdom. 

 

Her Bible was the Word that guided her life. 

 

Is my Bible the same? 

 

I will be honest and admit that I haven’t taken my Bible to church in years. 

My church prints the scripture readings each week so I don’t need it for worship, 

And when I study scripture on my own,

I read electronically on an online Bible platform. 

 

But after Mimi’s funeral, 

I began to wonder:

Am I missing something by not opening my Bible more often?

Am I forfeiting an opportunity to share with future generations what makes me tick?

 

My Bible has plenty of underlined passages from old. 

Might I need to update and underline passages of new—

New ways the Holy Spirit is helping me see and understand and live and be in this world?

Might I need to add new pictures and new little slips of paper with new quotes and new poems as bookmarks and reminders of people and places and events through whom God has spoken?

 

I think so.

 

Because if the Bible is the living word of God,

Then my Bible should show that much, 

Rather than serving as a time capsule from the past. 

 

Because if the Bible is the living word of God,

Then my Bible needs to be opened and read

Rather than just sitting on a shelf

Or riding around in the car. 

 

Because doing so would make Mimi proud. 

 

Because doing so is a privilege that I don’t want to take for granted

Any longer. 

 

May we each, like Mimi, 

Let God’s word guide us 

To be people of faith who

Do justice, 

Love Mercy,

and walk humbly with our God. 

 

Amen. 

Griffin's Texting Birthday

I’ll never forget that day. 

It was a Friday

And my sister was in labor with her first child. 

I was in divinity school at the time and

I had become good friends with someone who texted a lot. 

Until that point in my life, I had texted no one. 

On that day, though,  

19 years ago, 

At the hospital, waiting for Griffin to fly into the world,

I sent my first text to my text-loving friend,

And I haven’t looked back since! 

 

In those early days,

Text messages had a 130-character limit.

You paid to send and receive text messages

And so texting could be rather expensive. 

But I didn’t care.

It was new. 

And it was fun. 

And it allowed me to keep in touch with people without talking on the phone!

 

Now, I can’t imagine my life without it!

 

It’s amazing what a simple text can do.

An out of the blue thinking of you, 

A conversation easier to write than to say,

A joke,

A prayer,

A meme,

A picture,

From upstairs,

From across the country or world,

A text can literally change the course of someone’s day. 

A text can literally save someone’s life.

And a text is not hard to send.

 

No more 130 character limits.

No more tapping on the number 2 three times to get the letter C .

No more pay as you go. 

Just a qwerty keyboard for most

And an opportunity to influence someone’s life for the better for all.

 

I know.

Texts can be harmful too.

Cyber bullying is real and harmful and must be watched. 

But today, 

On my Griffin’s 19th birthday,

On this day that dramatically changed my life, 

I want to extol the goodness of texting 

And encourage you to use it for good. 

 

God—

You have given humankind the ability to think of cool things like texting. 

It blows my mind that written 

Words can invisibly fly through the air 

And make it to somewhere else

In a moment’s time. 

Thank you. 

Now, let us use those moments and texts for good. 

Amen. 

 

My Sister's Birthday

 

Today is my sister‘s birthday.

A few weeks ago,

I posted a note about quotes that have made an impact on me.

My brother got two quotes, but Dana did not get any.

She joked with me about that,

And I felt bad about not including her, 

But then I started thinking about it, 

And I realized that when I think of Dana,

I don’t think so much about specific words,

Rather, I think about a life lived to the fullest.

 

Dana is happy soul.

She loves to entertain and throw a good party.

She and her husband open their home many times a year for gatherings and get togethers 

That bring together people from across all walks of life.

There is always food, fellowship, and laughter 

And a sense of community that comes only from someone like Dana who genuinely cares for and sees the best in people.  

 

On one hand,

Dana lives spontaneously,

Always remaining open to the moment and 

To seeing what goodness can be pulled from it. 

On the other hand, 

Dana is the party planner mentioned above,

A webpage designer and administrator,

And a communications guru for topics from education to politics to the Raleigh Recorder Society. 

Yes, recorders.

The little instruments that you most often think of as torturing music teachers and elementary parents across the country.

My sister is a recorder expert,

And she makes the instrument enjoyable to hear. 

 

Dana is also a proud beekeeper and honey producer

Who will talk about bees with and provide a honey tasting for anyone interested.

One of my favorite images of Dana is of her being late for a family function because bees were swarming. 

I don’t remember the details of the story. 

All I know is that it captures my sister perfectly: 

Living in the moment with a fluid sense of time

While passionately caring for others, 

Or in this case, bees! 

 

So join me in wishing my sister, Dana,

Whose very life encourages me 

Even when a specific quote does not, 

A very Happy Birthday! 

 

Dana: You are loved!

And seen. 

And valued.

Today and every day. 

Happy birthday!

Common Courtesy

 

I went to Amelia The Niece’s choir concert on Friday night and watched something frustratingly funny happen. 

 

The concert was in a church sanctuary, so the audience was sitting on pews. 

My family and I were sitting about halfway back. 

 

Proper concert etiquette for a choral concert, 

or any non-rock band live music concert really, 

is to arrive on time, 

to sit quietly and listen, 

to only enter and exit during applause if you must leave for some reason, 

to turn your phone to silent, 

and not to film. 

Some performance programs specifically request that you do not film due to copyright infringement 

While other performance programs do not mention this request. 

But still, it’s courteous to the people behind you not to film during the concert. 

Holding your camera up obstructs people’s view and accidentally encourages people to look through your camera instead of at the actual performers. 

 

We just so happened to end up sitting three and four rows behind two different families who did not follow proper filming concert etiquette.

 

Each time their children sang,

They held up their phones and recorded the entire song.

 

What was frustratingly funny was that at the end of the concert, all groups sang together.

So both camera families needed to film.

The family on the third row up got annoyed with the family on the fourth row up and moved to the right so that their view would not be obstructed.

They then held up their camera and obstructed the view of the people newly behind them.

I couldn’t help but think of how inconsiderate that was,

To do the exact thing that was annoying them in the first place.

 

We live in a society that encourages us to put our own needs first. 

Maybe we should live counter-culturally 

And consider how we can be courteous to those around us while also taking care of our own needs.

 

In this instance:

Film a few seconds. 

Sit on the outside aisle so that your camera is not in the middle aisle.

Snap a picture during the applause.

Remember the performance in your brain rather than trying to keep everything on your phone.

How often do we go back and watch our videos anyway?

 

It’s little things, really,

That show courtesy:

Holding the door for the customer behind you,

Being ready to go through the ATM before you drive up to the machine,

Asking the person behind you if it’s OK to recline your seat a little on the plane,

Not singing along in the movie theater even though you really want to sing along.

 

May we be a people of courtesy that’s not so common anymore 

And may we not do to others the exact same things that annoy us. 

 

Amen. 

A Dream Come True

 

My mom has been playing piano for 73 years.

She started lessons when she was 8

And been playing ever since.

 

For as long as I can remember,

Daily piano playing has been part of my mom’s life.

I remember the Story and Clark in the dining room of the parsonage in Tabor City,

I remember it in the living room at the house on Forest Avenue, and

I remember it in the living room of the parsonage in Bunnlevel.

I remember getting the Yamaha Baby Grand when we moved into our current house,

And it is her joy to play it.

 

Two years ago this winter,

My mom invited a family friend into the house with his recording equipment.

Together, they recorded 17 of her favorite songs.

Because of various life circumstances,

Nothing happened with those 17 songs until a couple of months ago…

When the wheels of producing a CD finally began to turn.

 

With the help of my sister and another family friend,

My mom produced a very professional, top-notch CD.

My mom’s dream was to gift this CD to friends and family members

Who have encouraged her along the way.

 

Her dream came true yesterday when she gave away 30 physical CDs

And shared the web address to her online playlist with many others.   

 

I think what’s so special about my mom’s playing is that it’s not just playing.

It’s her heart.

And she has now shared that heart with the world,

 

To say that I am proud is an understatement.

I know of my mom’s hard work and her dedication to the craft,

And I know that she considers playing piano her highest act of worship.

 

I am blessed beyond measure to be the beneficiary of my mom’s practice,

And I consider it pure joy to have witnessed her concert yesterday

And to have seen the tears of humility and gratitude stream down her face.

 

…

 

One of my mom’s shirt’s says:

God grant me the serenity to accept things I cannot change,

Courage to change things when I can, and

Wisdom to know when to play the piano.

 

May I be so wise as my mom,

And use my talents for the betterment of others

And building of God’s kin-dom of Love.

 

Amen.