JellyCats

 

Some of you may remember my failed Christmas gifts:

Sentimental fancy jewelry for a 3^rd and 7^th grader?

Well, I made up for it yesterday when I somewhat randomly

Sent them JellyCats.

 

What are JellyCats, you ask?

They are stuffed animals.

I have no idea what makes them different than other stuffed animals,

But the girls love them

And hold them in high esteem

And so I went to The Amazon and sent two JellyCat foxes their way.

 

Their mom wrote yesterday to tell me that

She had two very excited girls with new JellyCats!

 

I smiled.

 

Then I asked:

Did they get the gift tags that went with them?

 

They didn’t.

 

To me, it was the most important part of the gift:

The literal reminder of what the gifts were meant to show—

“You are both loved so very much.”

 

To me, that’s what a gift is:

A tangible reminder of an intangible love.

 

We show love by showing up.

We show love by saying it.

We show love by listening.

We show love by taking out the trash.

We show love in the little things,

Day in and day out,

But sometimes we need to show love in an extra way,

And so we offer simple gifts,

Ones meant to shine light in times of darkness,

Ones meant to lift spirits in times of confusion,

Ones meant to bring a smile when it seems that tears are all that will come,

Ones meant to ground a person in reality when it seems that the world is slipping away.

 

I know one day the girls will come to appreciate their Christmas jewelry.

But for right now, in the bleak midwinter of January,

The girls needed to know through JellyCats

That they are so very loved.

 

Friends:

The hurts of this world are palpable.

May we offer soothing balms of love this week

Through jewelry or JellyCats or

Showing up or sending a text or

Making a phone call or sending flowers or

Doing someone’s lunch duty or

Listening when we ask, “How are you?”

Or…

 

Amen.

Failed Christmas Presents

It’s no secret that one of my favorite things is gem mining. 

I love the process of sorting through dirt and discovering small treasures. 

Over the years, I’ve collected and given a lot of unpolished gems

And a few years ago, I gave away gems that I had polished in my rock tumbler. 

But it wasn’t until this year that I actually paid to have gems cut, professionally polished, and turned into jewelry. 

 

At the time of this year’s mining, 

Having the stones set for the three people I was with seemed like a great idea! 

“These will make great birthday and Christmas presents,” I thought. 

“And they will be something they can keep forever.”

I was super excited! 

I even came home and ordered silver chains to go with the pendants. 

 

But then reality set in a couple of weeks ago: 

Nice jewelry isn’t at the top of a 3rd and a 7th graders’ gift lists .  

Their mama’s? Yes! 

Theirs? No. 

 

Nevertheless, I persisted 

And presented the girls with sapphire and aquamarine necklaces, 

Cut and polished from stones that we had found together on our spontaneous summer getaway away. 

 

Ideally, the girls would have loved their necklaces. 

In reality, they were disappointed in this year’s Christmas gifts.

Last year, I scored big with a Stanley cup and a life-sized teddy bear. 

This year, I got demerits for fancy jewelry . 

 

Don’t get me wrong. 

The girls are not ungrateful brats. 

They will come to appreciate the value of their gifts in due time. 

But for now,

They are just kids. 

And I temporarily forgot that kids like trends and toys more than sentimental necklaces . 

 

So, if you’re like me, 

Then this holiday season will be filled with both joys and disappointments. 

You will both fail and succeed in your gift giving 

And you will be both genuinely happy and pretendedly happy in your gift receiving. 

 

Through it all, though,

Just remember this:

If your heart is in the right place, 

Then that is what matters. 

It’s not about money. 

It’s not about scoring big. 

It’s about giving and receiving love, 

Even when the tangible gift is not fully appreciated in return. 

 

I drove home from my failed gift giving smiling. 

I gave the girls a gift they get to grow into. 

It’s not trendy. 

It’s not a toy. 

It’s a little piece of my heart, 

Of something that I hold dear, 

And I have no regrets…

Except maybe I should have thrown in some baseball cards and Jellycats . 

School Gift--Bats

I’m not exactly sure where they came from,

But Barb the Great gave me in a tin full of purple bats.  

I can’t imagine the original intent of said purple bats,

But I decided they’d be perfect for a little school-gift,

Especially around this time of year.

 

Yesterday morning, I set out to write the bat’s message.

But, boy did I struggle!

 

Educators don’t really want to read anything placed in their boxes.

Reading takes time.

And time is a hot commodity.

So, school-gifts must be short, lest they immediately go in the trash.

School-gifts must also be straightforward, uplifting, and/or challenging

Because teachers often don’t have the brain space to think of anything

Other than what they’re teaching.

 

And so…

I started writing.

It went dark quickly because bats are traumatic for me.

While it’s important to know about trauma—

Especially in children—

A school-gift isn’t the time to learn.

 

And so…

I edited.

I know that bats are good for the environment and that they’re actually kind of cute.

While it’s important for us to realize that bats are endangered and that they are needed—

Especially to combat mosquitoes—

A school-gift isn’t the time to ponder the merits of bats.

 

And so…

I edited.

I’ve worked on overcoming my fear of bats in therapy.

While it’s important to know the benefits of therapy and of

Doing the hard work of overcoming fear for yourself—

Especially for those in the helping professions—

A school-gift isn’t the time to consider therapy.

 

And so…

I edited.

I’ve let go of some of my bat fear,

But I think part of it will probably always remain.

While it’s important to recognize that fears don’t always go away—

Especially fears that are tied to trauma—

A school-gift isn’t the time to embrace that reality.

 

And so…

I edited.

And finally, I came up with this:

 

A bat flew at my head once. It was inside my house. It scared me. A lot.

Rationally, I know that bats are good. Irrationally, because of that moment, I have a deep fear of bats.

Fear is a powerful thing. It can both motivate and debilitate us. It can both push us to try new things and stop us in our tracks. We all have fears. We all have things both tangible and intangible that scare us.

But do not fret, friends. Fear is not the final word. The opposite of fear is hope, courage, determination, resilience, and strength. The opposite of fear is love. And love is the final word.

Hold to that truth today and in the days to come…especially as you face your fears.

 

May this latest school-gift be also a blessing to you.

And may you truly hold to one reality that is the final word:

Love,

For God IS love.

Even if God created bats.

 

On Woodworking

 

I had the privilege of visiting a friend over the weekend

And getting to work with her master-craftsman husband on a bookshelf.

We started from large planks of wood,

Measured and cut boards,

Sanded them,

Trimmed them,

Squared and clamped them,

Glued them,

Screwed them together,

Made and placed little screw-hole covers,

Sanded again,

And finally blew off the sawdust.

I now have a super sturdy small bookshelf that I only need to coat with polyurethane

And then he’ll be ready to go.

I’m calling my bookshelf Ray, Jr.,

In honor of the man who built him.

 

The part that I helped most with was the sanding.

(I’m not yet trustworthy with sharp, cutting power tools).

Ray The Woodworker has an electric sander that

He can hook into his Shop-Vac for zero visible waste!

Ray made sanding look easy.

It was not!

The wood resisted being ground down,

And the sander tried to run away on its own.

I had to stand with both feet firmly planted on the ground

And press down with all my strength to control the sander.

Once under control,

The sander did all the work!

 

What’s really odd is that when I was doing the sanding,

I couldn’t see the difference in the wood being sanded.

But when I watched Ray do the sanding,

I could immediately see where he’d smoothed the wood.  

 

I think this is how it is with life sometimes.

When we’re in a process of transformation,

We can’t always see the change.

Sometimes, we resist the change.

Sometimes, we must keep both feet firmly planted on the ground in order for the change to occur.

But if we keep ourselves open,

If we persevere,

And if we allow ourselves to believe the voices of those encouraging us in the process,

Then we will see our rough edges made smooth

And witness our inner beauty shining through.

 

I would not trade my experience with Ray The Woodworker for anything.

He freely shared his love of his craft with me and

Made for (with) me something I will always cherish.

 

May we each be as kind to one another as Ray was to me,

And may we listen to one another’s voices of encouragement

In times of growth and change.

 

Amen.

An Unexpected Gift

 

When I got home from my NYC Day Trip yesterday,

I had a package waiting for me

From Thomas the Tin Art Teacher.

Not expecting a package,

I excitedly, but carefully, opened it.

 

There was a note:

Be careful what you put on FB, he said.

Because you might just get something in response.

He then went on to explain that his gift

Had been sitting in his attic, for years,

And that he thought it might be better served with me.

 

As I began unwrapping his gift—

A tin, nativity scene from Mexico—

I couldn’t help but marvel at the beauty of Thomas’s gift,

And the fact that he thought enough of me to

1.      Think of me at all.

2.      Go into the attic to unearth the treasure.

3.      Gently package the individual pieces of the nativity.

4.      Retrieve my address.

5.      Go to the post office and pay to send real mail.

 

What an amazing gift!

 

This Holiday Season,

As gift giving weighs heavily on people’s minds and hearts,

May we find ways to achieve the unexpected,

And may the intentions of our hearts

Outweigh the demands of the mind.

 

Gift giving doesn’t have to be a burden,

Rather it can be an overflow of the heart’s love.

And remember that the heart’s love can be shown by

Words of Affirmation,

Quality Time,

Gifts (including the gift of time),

Acts of Service, and/or

Physical Touch.

 

May we find the perfect gifts for those we love,

And may those gifts bring smiles to faces,

And warmth to hearts…

Amen.

DD Warrior Lady

 Last week, as I was standing on afternoon car duty,

A 2^nd grader stopped and said,
“I have something for you, Ms. Deaton,

For being the best music teacher ever.”

She then fumbled through her bookbag and produced a Pokémon card.

Afterward, she mumbled something about someone being mad at her or

Her being mad at someone and

How they didn’t deserve something and

Then she walked away.

I have no idea what she was saying.

 

I have three observations on this event, though:

 

1)      I’m the only music teacher she’s ever had, so I hope I’m the best one 😊. I also hope I deserve the title of best music teacher ever, not because I think I AM the best, but because I try to do my job well and to love all of my students…even the ones who push boundaries and try patience—which, quite honestly, is this girl.

 

2)      I have a feeling that I got a present that day not because she had planned to give ME a present but because the intended recipient of said gift had made her mad. Sometimes, the best gifts are unplanned, spontaneous ones. And sometimes what may have been intended for one purpose is better served as another.  

 

3)      I have no interest in Pokémon cards and don’t really understand them. But the card she gave me was absolutely perfect: DD Warrior Lady. If I’m going to own a Pokémon card, then this is the one I want to own. Deanna Deaton Strong Fighter Trooper Woman.

 

So thank you, dear second grade student who impulsively gave me DD Warrior Lady.

Your gift encouraged and challenged me to be

A better version of myself.

A teacher—

A warrior—

A woman ready for battle…

And every day in the classroom IS a battle.

 

Amen.

On Fixing My Hem Line

On Saturday, I had the privilege of playing my guitar at a wedding. The bride wanted to surprise her groom with a special song during the ceremony, so she asked me to accompany the man who would be singing. The song we performed was the song to which the bride walked down the aisle. The groom had no idea that she wasn’t going to enter to “Here Comes The Bride.” It was a really neat surprise. But back up a few hours, though, and you will find me at home with a wardrobe malfunction. The hem had fallen out of one leg of my black dress pants. I debated leaving it as it was, figuring that no one would be paying attention to the hem of my pants. After all, I had on a black shirt, black pants, black socks, and black shoes—was the hem line even that noticeable? In the end, I decided to ask my mom if she had any stick pins. I figured I could pin the hem as a temporary fix. Here’s where my mom stepped in and did what moms tend to do. Not finding any stick pins or safety pins, she went into her closet and pulled out her sewing kit. The next thing I knew, she was telling me to sit down on the couch and put my foot on her knee. She then proceeded to stitch a “quick fix” hem line into my pants. Suddenly, I felt and looked as good as new. I felt really honored to have been asked to be part of my friend’s wedding for such a special surprise. But I felt equally as honored to have walked into the wedding looking my best because of my mom’s simple gift. Love is demonstrated to us in many different ways--big and small--surprise songs and emergency hems. When is the last time someone demonstrated his/her love to you through a simple act of service or an invaluable gift? Take a moment to answer that question now...and be grateful. I know I am.

Ram Skull Painting

Last summer in Romania, my main task was to help with crafts at a summer camp. One day, my team and I were tasked with doing crafts outside as part of a horse-back riding adventure. In between sessions, I went wandering in the woods. As I wandered, I found a fully in tact ram skull. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I knew that Barb the Art Teacher would be fascinated, so I took a bunch of pictures and immediately sent them to her…

Fast forward to yesterday.

Barb presented me with a painting of the ram skull.

I almost cried because I was so happy.

To say that I like it is an understatement.

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Sometime last Fall, I decided to buy a rock tumbler. One of my friends is as fascinated with rock tumbling as me, so I showed her my collection. Unbeknownst to me, she took some rocks to make a special gift for my birthday.

I almost cried because I was so happy.

To say that I like it is an understatement.

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A couple of weeks ago, I helped another friend paint her daughter’s bedroom. She had on a Meredith College t-shirt and I commented, in what I thought was passing, that I’d like a Meredith shirt. Little did I know that my request had been heard and that in less than a month, I’d have my own Meredith shirt.

I almost cried because I was so happy.

To say that I like it is an understatement.

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Yesterday, I received over 200 FB messages from friends. I also received 4 cards in the mail.

Friends are specials gift that should not be taken for granted. I am so incredibly grateful to have amazing friends.

Thank YOU, friend, for being part of my journey.

And I challenge you today: Reach out to someone you love and remind him/her that you love them. It could be a FB message, a card, a call, or an amazing gift. But reach out to someone today.

It might make them cry because they will be so happy.

And to say that they will like it is an understatement.