Unexpected Praise

 

I stopped by Jersey Mike’s for lunch on last Friday’s work day.

As I stood in line to wait for my sandwich,

I heard the manager say,

“You guys just rocked that. 

That was so good. 

I know it was a lot at once. 

But you did it. 

And you rocked it.

And everything looked beautiful. 

I’m so proud of you guys!”

 

I’ve had the privilege of working for cheerleaders for the past many years. 

I feel appreciated by my boss and 

I’m thankful to work for someone who sees what I do and expresses his gratefulness on a regular basis. 

 

But not everyone can say that. 

 

In fact, I imagine that most people can’t. 

 

I think that’s why the Jersey MIke’s manager’s words 

Meant so much to me. 

She was genuinely proud of her team, 

She knew they were discouraged, 

So she shared her encouragement through praise. 

And even though the teenagers that she was working with didn’t really acknowledge her speech,

I think it meant a lot to them. 

How could it not? 

They had been seen and their time and efforts had been valued. 

And, after all, isn’t that what most of us deeply desire?

 

May this be a reminder that 

Words are powerful

And that sometimes they affect even the people they aren’t meant to reach.

 

May we use our words to build up and encourage

And when we see something good,

May we hold it in light and 

Celebrate the people involved in the goodness,

Especially when they may not often hear words of encouragement and praise. 

 

Amen. 

And Then I Cried

 Shortly after finishing Monday’s note,

I realized that I didn’t have a picture of Kay.

As any good 21^st-centurian would do,

I took to the Interwebs to look for a picture of this woman who had come to mean so much.

The thing is?

I found obituaries and old scholarship information,

But I couldn’t find a picture.

As I continued to search,

I came across an article honoring Kay.

At the end of the article,

Kay was quoted as saying:

 

“I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through…I trust that you already know that my heart just aches for you…I know that all things work together for good to those who serve God. So I trust that as I act moment by moment to follow God’s leading, God will work through my decisions. In any event, I know with assurance that God is already working. God’s action is to bring about good things for you and for the body of Christ. There’s no doubt. We just have to wait. As we’ve all figured out for one reason or another, life isn’t fair and justice is hard to find. Mostly I’d like for you to get through it. It happened and requires you to work in order to get through it—but I pray that you get THROUGH rather than remain in it. So I hope you’ll spend exactly the right amount of time processing it all and doing what it takes to attend to it so that it will be well and truly over. I love you very much! You take my love and respect and appreciation with you where you go…I’m proud of you, you’ve been faithful.”

 

I screen-shotted her words.

And then I cried.

 

God: Thank you that our hearts and words live on long after we’re gone. May Kay’s words, today, bless and encourage someone who needs to hear them…seventeen years after they were written. Thank you, God, that you are already working and that your action is to bring about good in a world that seems to celebrate evil. You ARE good. And we ARE trying to be faithful. Amen.  

 

Oh! And by the way—

After thirty minutes of tears and searching,

I found Kay’s picture in a PDF brochure.

It’s not the best quality in the world.

But it will do.

😊

Have A Great Day

At the beginning of August, one of my real-life friends from camp friended me on Facebook. Almost every day since we’ve reconnected, this friend has written to say, “Hope you have a great day.” I write her back and say, “You too.” Then she writes me back with a thumbs up. It’s only been six weeks, but it’s come to be a ritual that I look forward to each day. Here is this friend that I haven’t talked to in almost twenty years suddenly letting me know that she’s thinking of me and wishing me well! What’s more, she’s an assistant in the public schools who starts her days SUPER early and is very often overlooked and underappreciated for her work. It would be easy for her to go about her days and not write, yet she does. And I have a feeling I’m not the only person she writes. Friends: May we be a people of positive, encouraging structures and routines, And may we use our presence in each other’s lives to build up rather than destroy. I know I sound like a broken record, but I believe it so much: Words have power. Even simple words such as, “Hope you have a great day.” Thank you, Amanda, for inspiring me and making a simple yet profound difference in my life. The world needs more people like you.

Words Have Power

Earlier in the week, at the bottom of a work-related e-mail exchange, I had a colleague write: “Thanks for all you do. I see all your hard work!” Such a simple statement…but those words have passed through my mind a gazillion times since reading them. “I see all your hard work.” There’s something to being seen. Not glazed over. Not overlooked. But seen. Paid attention to. Valued. In a work environment where I literally don’t see anyone other than my team of five—and that’s if I’m lucky—being seen is a challenge. And yet, this colleague sees me. And my hard work. And I have been working so very hard (as has the entire Teacher Body of the 2020-2021 School Year). Friends—I have said this time and time again, but I will say it again: Words have power. Even to those who don’t claim Words of Affirmation as their primary love language, words are transformational. Specific. True. Intentional words can literally change someone’s life… I have an encouragement folder in my e-mail. It’s full of messages that have encouraged me over the years. My colleague’s message is now in that folder. Friends: May we be writers of messages that make it into one another’s encouragement folders. Amen.

The Power of Positive Words

My nephew loves basketball. In fact, ever since he was a little boy, basketball has been his thing. He watches it. Studies it. Practices it. Plays it whenever he can. He truly loves the game.

Last weekend, he and his Rec. League team played for the Rec. League championship. In the first game of the tournament, they trailed the entire game until close to the end when they took their opponents into overtime and eventually won the game. In the second game of the tournament, they trailed the entire game until close to the end when they pulled ahead and won. And in the third game of the tournament, they did the same thing: they stayed behind the whole game until the end of the game, when they squeaked ahead and won by only 2 points. Needless to say, the games were very intense. And, honestly, I think that everyone was surprised that they pulled off the win!

My nephew himself was especially concerned about the last game. His team was playing the #1 team in the league and they were missing one of their best players. As we left the second game, my nephew mentioned that he didn’t think his team could win the next night without the full team. I told him that I believed they could win regardless (because I did). I told him that I hoped that he would go out and play like he believed they could win—not to defeat himself with negative self-talk. Evidently, my dad told him the same thing, and my mom sent him a text saying similar things the day of the championship game.

So after the third game was over, I found it incredibly sweet and humbling to hear my nephew say to me, in his deep, changing voice: I kept hearing you and Nana and Poppy telling me not to give up—to believe that we could win—and we did!

Friends: It may seem like people aren’t listening, but they are. And we never know the impact of our words to influence a situation for the better (or worse).

May we be a people of uplifting, kind, true, and encouraging words. And may we hold to positive words over negative ones, especially in a culture that thrives on negativity and fear.

Amen and amen.

Context Matters

Yesterday, as my parents and I traveled to and from my nephew’s basketball game in Apex, we listened to the Broadway station on satellite radio. Some of the songs were familiar. Most of the songs were not. Some of the songs made sense. Most of the songs did not. Out of context, even the most celebrated songs can be misinterpreted and misjudged.

Context is important. Overarching storyline matters. When we hear only part of a conversation but have no idea its context, we often misinterpret the words and read into them our own version of reality. When we read only parts of scripture but have no idea of the larger narrative, we often misinterpret the words and read into them our own version of truth.

One summer, while working at camp, I heard only part of a conversation. I heard that I needed to buy twelve and a half dozen eggs but had no idea what I was buying them for. Even after questioning the amount, I still blindly went to the store and bought twelve and a half dozen eggs. Come to find out, we only needed 18 eggs for an egg dropping competition. 132 extra eggs went to waste…because I didn’t understand the context of the part of the larger conversation I had heard.

Thankfully, buying too many eggs didn’t damage someone’s reputation. But hearing things out of context most certainly can. Thankfully, buying too many eggs didn’t lead to scriptural abuse. But reading scripture out of context, most certainly can.

May we be a people who do not settle for bits and pieces of muddy information but who seek the entire picture of contextual truth. It may take a bit of time to put things into context, but that time is well worth the effort when it leads to clear understanding of what is being seen and heard.

Oh God: Help us. Amen. And Amen.

Words of Affirmation

I had a performance with my Kindergarten and 1st grade students on Monday night. 110 students showed up to sing and dance for their “teachers, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, brothers, sisters, next door neighbors, and friends,” and I was very proud of them. They’d been working hard to share their learning, and in the moment of truth, they showed up.

After the performance, I was exhausted. I went home and tried to sleep, but I couldn’t. I always feel vulnerable after performances—wondering if what I did was “good enough,” fearing that it wasn’t, preparing for complaints, secretly longing for compliments and words of affirmation…

As I stood in the car rider line on Tuesday afternoon, a grandfather rolled down his window and asked if I was the music teacher. I said that I was. He then told me how wonderful the program had been the night before. I almost cried.

Then I received an e-mail from a parent that did made me cry:

“Hello! I just wanted to say congratulations on a job well done last night! You made everything look so easy from beginning to end! So many people were so impressed at how well the kids knew their songs. I can speak for all the kindergarten teachers when I say that we love how you find ways to incorporate our learning objectives into your music!

I kept trying to figure out how my daughter knew how to skip count by 2’s. Her teacher told me they haven’t focused real hard on that yet. Now I know it was YOU! She has figured out, on her own, how to count by 2’s to 100! And... even though she tortures my soul with the non-stop skip counting...(every time we get in the car to go somewhere🤪), both me and my husband are so glad she so fortunate to have such a fun and amazing music teacher!!!”

Teachers put a lot of effort and intention into what we teach. We log many long hours at work and then log many more at home. I am somewhat fortunate to work in a performance field where my work can easily be commended and applauded, but classroom teachers often are not given the accolades they deserve. Many teachers often only hear criticism—and wonder if they are good enough, fearing that they aren’t, while secretly longing for compliments and words of affirmation.

If you know a teacher, consider sending him/her some accolades today—especially if you are a parent of a school-aged kid. It’s not teacher appreciation week. It’s nothing special that I know of. It’s just a Thursday…but I have a feeling that it’s a good day for affirmation.

Lost in Wonder, Love, and Praise

My parents and I led a candlelight service together last night. As we were discussing worship plans, my dad raised the all-important musical question: Are we going to sing all of the verses of the hymns or just the first and last? I said, “One thing I’ve learned this Advent Season is that we miss a lot of really good words when we don’t pay attention to or skip over the verses of familiar songs, so we’re going to sing all of them.”

On the first Sunday of Advent to fit with the theme of hope and during yesterday’s Advent service centered on peace, we sang “It Came Upon A Midnight Clear.” Other than the words of the first verse that always resonate with me—Peace on the earth, good will to men, from heaven’s all gracious king—the words that have been speaking to me this year are the second and third verses:

Yet with the woes of sing and strife the world has suffered long,
Beneath the angel strain have rolled two thousand years of wrong.
And man at war with man hears not the love song which they bring;
Oh hush the noise ye men of strife and hear the angels sing.

All ye, beneath life’s crushing load, whose forms are bending low,
Who toil along the climbing way with painful steps and slow,
Look now for glad and golden hours come swiftly on the wing;
Oh rest beside the weary road and hear the angels sing.

On the second Sunday of Advent, to fit with the theme of love, we sang these unfamiliar words to a familiar hymn-tune (Bring a Torch):

Love has come, a light in the darkness!...

Love is born! Come share in the wonder. Love is God now asleep in the hay. See the glow in the eyes of His mother; what is the name her heart is saying? Love! Love! Love is the name she whispers. Love! Love! Jesus, Immanuel.

Love has come—He never will leave us! Love is life everlasting and free. Love is Jesus within and among us; Love is the peace our hearts are seeking. Love! Love! Love is the gift of Christmas. Love! Love! Praise to you God on high!

And these:

Love divine, all loves excelling, joy of heaven to earth come down. Fix in us thy humble dwelling, all thy faithful mercies crown. Jesus, thou are all compassion, pure, unbounded love thou art. Visit us with thy salvation; enter every trembling heart.

Breathe, oh breathe, thy loving Spirit, into every troubled breast! Let us all in thee inherit, let us find the promised rest. Take away our bent to sinning; Alpha and Omega be. End of faith, as its beginning, set our hearts at liberty.

Come, Almighty, to deliver, let us all thy grace receive…Pray and praise thee without ceasing, glory in thy perfect love.

Finish, then, thy new creation; pure and spotless let us be. Let us see thy great salvation perfectly restored in thee. Changed from glory into glory till in heaven we take our place. Till we cast our crowns before thee, lost in wonder, love, and praise.

Oh God, music is such a powerful thing.
So help us as we sing, this Advent Season and beyond,
To pay attention to the words of longing and confession that have been sung by
So many people throughout the years from throughout the world.
Help us to hear—to really hear—your words of compassion, freedom, and grace and
Help us to get lost in your wonder, love, and praise.
Always.
Amen.

Words Are Powerful

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., ends his iconic “I Have A Dream” speech with the following words:

“When we let freedom ring…from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, ‘Free at last! free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

I like to play this clip for my students each year so that they can hear Dr. King’s voice and see part of an historic American speech…and because “Free At Last” is one of the songs that my textbook writers included for study.

While I’ve always thought it neat that we could listen to Dr. King’s words and then immediately sing the song that he was referencing, I didn’t fully grasp the profundity of it until this year.

Sometime during my second day of teaching the lesson, while looking around the room at my students, I realized that we were doing exactly what Dr. King had dreamed. No. We weren’t literally holding hands and singing in a large human chain, but our hands were joined in following music from the same textbooks, under the same roof, at the same school, and our hands were all different shades of human.

One of my students asked me what Martin Luther King, Jr., did to earn a holiday if he wasn’t a president and how he changed the world if he didn’t use guns or violence. I said, “He used his words.”

Words are powerful.

While recovering from a recent bout with a stomach virus, I stumbled upon a somewhat dramatic episode of “Touched By An Angel.” In the episode, Gus, a down-on-his-luck insurance salesman, sold his soul to the devil in exchange for the commission on an insurance policy that would provide enough money for him to care for his ailing wife. Monica, an angel, was very concerned about Gus’s actions and consulted Tess, the head angel, about what to do—because she felt that all she had to offer was words. Tess responded, “That’s what it’s all about, baby. Words. And we’ve got to shine the light on them so Gus can see what they really are. What they can do. Before it’s too late.”

When Monica went to talk to Gus and Gus confessed his belief that the contract for his soul was just words, Monica pleaded: “Don’t you understand? In the beginning was the Word. Words started everything. You know, it doesn’t matter if you speak your words to [your wife] or the devil or the child on the street. Words have meaning. You say them and you give them life. And whether you speak them into the air or write them down on a piece of paper your words mean as much as the oath you took on your wedding day, binding your soul to [your wife] forever. With God as your witness.” Eventually, Gus chose to sing the words to “This Little Light of Mine” and the devil and her contract faded away and all was well.

Words.
Fact or fiction.
Written or spoken.
Past or present.
Words hold power.
Words change lives.
And love does, too.

Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it. –Martin Luther King, Jr.

May we use our words to
change lives in love
today and all the days to come.
Amen.