Shame

 Shame.

 

Such a deeply-seated emotion. And so very difficult to work through.

 

According to the dictionary, shame is "a painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior." What I have come to understand, however, is that this consciousness is often of PERCEIVED wrong or foolish behavior--especially when it comes to identity. 

 

Many times, we are shamed by other people--shown by their actions that we are thought to be inferior, less than, not good enough, worthless, alone.

 

Many times, we are shamed by ourselves--convinced by that little voice in our heads that we are inferior, less than, not good enough, worthless, alone. 

 

Regardless, whether the shame is real or perceived, whether it is brought to us by others or ourselves, shame is one of the most difficult emotions that we can feel and work through. 

 

In my own journey through shame, I have written: 

 

Dear God--

Everything is falling apart and

Life is extremely challenging.

Assist me now and

Help me triumph over injustice and lies.

Put behind me the

Ignorance of

Simple minds,

Hurtful words, and

Harsh judgments.

Speak wisdom into my life. 

I yearn for truth and peace.

Meaningful existence has escaped me.

I am overwhelmed and undervalued.

Dear God? 

Help.

 

And help is all we CAN ask for when working through shame. Help from friends. Help from family. Help from a counselor. Help from God. Help to remember that we are loved and that no words, experience, reality, or blindside can ever change the fact we are persons of worth and value. Period. 

 

Amen.