Alone vs. Social

When I was in college, I never snacked on the snacks in my room. Instead, I snacked on the snacks in a friend’s room—not because I was too cheap to buy them for myself—but because, I realized, I’m a social snacker. To a certain extent, I’m still the same way. I don’t snack a lot at home, but if you put me with a group of people and make snacks available, then I can snack with the best of them. I’m coming to realize that the same is true with fire. I love contained fire. I have a fire pit. I have wood. I’ve learned how to start fire. There is no reason that I can’t build a fire for myself on a clear summer or crisp fall night. Yet I don’t. But put me in front of a contained fire with friends or family members, and I’m about as happy as I can be. In fact, one of my friends commented the other night, “We’re seeing Deanna in her happy place right now.” I was standing by the fire at her house, fire stick in hand, listening to the sound of her little girls’ laughter. There are some things that we must do alone—think of therapy or self-care. There are some things that we choose to do alone—think of reading a book. There are some things that we are forced to do alone—think of taking a test. And that’s okay. There are times when alone is required or needed. But there are some things that are just plain better with people—think of going to the theatre. There are some things that we choose to do only with other people—think of parties. There are some things we are forced to do with other people—think of group projects. And that’s okay, too. There are times with other people are required or needed. Life must be a balance. We must have our introverted and extraverted moments. We must know when alone vs. together is best. And we must embrace each of those times for what they are… Ultimately, I’m glad that I’m a social snacker vs. a solo snacker. And I’m glad that I’m a social contained firer vs. a solo contained firer. Alone, both could be dangerous. What about you? What are your alone go-to’s vs. your social go-to’s? And when is the last time you had a social gathering that made you smile? And by the way…that friend who declared me in my happy place the other night is the same friend from whose room I snacked in college. Long-lasting friendships are beautiful things. Take a few moments to celebrate your long-lasting friendships now. You never know when a word from you will make all the difference in the world.