Fireflies

Two weekends ago, I had the privilege of providing the special music for a women’s retreat in Arapahoe. While I was making the three-hour trip, I noticed a super cool billboard that said: “Gotta Go? Newly renovated restrooms in (however many) miles.” The image on the billboard was of a non-descript person crossing his/her legs in the “I’ve got to pee” stance. The logo on the billboard was for an outdoor store. I smiled as I drove by and thought to myself, “That is the first time I’ve ever seen a roadside advertisement flat out address the fact that sometimes we really need to stop but have no idea where we will go...”

Many years ago, I saw another roadside sign that said, “Next Rest Stop 42 miles.” At first, I was mad. I thought that the sign was taunting me, tormenting me, and telling me that I’d need to wait for 42 miles to stop and use the restroom. But then I realized something very important: If I could just hold on for 42 miles, then I would be assured of clean, safe restrooms and I wouldn’t have to pull off on every exit and hope to find a decent gas station or restaurant bathroom. I realized that just knowing what was ahead helped me keep going…

Shortly after the rest stop sign encounter, I wrote a song called, “Fireflies.” I was at summer camp, sitting in a field, waiting for a clear sign from God, when all I saw was darkness…until I noticed the fireflies. They were everywhere. I couldn’t tell when or where they’d light up. But they kept lighting up. All around me. And in their small lights, I realized that God was telling me something: I am already here, Deanna. I am all around you. You don’t have to wait for some big sign. I am in the love of your friends and family. I am in the calm of the wind. I am in the peace of the trees. I am in scripture. I am in prayer. I am in laughter. I am in tears. I am all around you. Please, just to open your eyes and see. I am right here…

I shared a bit of this story with the ladies on the retreat two weekends ago and then I sang the song.
Later that night, they saw fireflies. In them they saw a flash of God’s light and heard the promise that God will never leave or forsake them. Maybe you need to be reminded of that promise tonight. And maybe you will never again see fireflies the same.

“I was sittin’ alone in the dark one night ~ Lookin’ at the stars through a break in the trees ~ The moon covered up by the grey, summer clouds ~ I was waitin’ to see God’s face ~ So I sat and I sat and I waited ~ I waited for what seemed like years ~ Blinded my stupidity ~ I couldn’t see through my fears ~~ Oh the answer, it was in front of me ~ It was behind me, beside me ~ Little flashes of light all around me ~ But still I could not see ~ Fireflies, oh fireflies ~ Rays of hope, short feelings of peace ~ At the right time they come ~ To carry us through until the day we the Son ~~ I was driving down the road one day ~ When I really needed to stop ~ But then I saw a bright blue sign that said ~ “Rest stop 42 miles” ~ So in pain I drudged on, I drove and I drove ~ Knowing that soon I’d get relief ~ The knowledge of what was ahead of me ~ Helped me to persist ~~ Oh the answer it was in front of me ~ It was inside me, a part of me ~ In my heart and soul ~ Knowing I’m not alone ~ But still I could not see ~~ Fireflies – Fireflies”