Hope

*Trigger Warning: Labor, miscarriage, and stillbirth*

 

Yesterday at church, my pastor asked the question: What does hope look like to you?

 

She presented answers that friends had given via Facebook, and she talked of the hope given by Jesus and the prophets. She built on Jesus’ metaphor of the hope of pregnancy—the promise of new life after the pains of birth…

 

And yet all I could think is that life is not promised from pregnancy. There are miscarriages. And still births. There are mothers who die during delivery. There are fathers who never make it home to see their child. There are dreams shattered. And hopes crushed.

 

According to the dictionary, hope is “a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.” According to me, these days, hope is either small, like a cat waiting for her food or toys, or big, like a contestant on a reality show waiting to find out if she has made it through to the next round. Put into words, the latter is longing and wishing coupled with anxiety and fear.

 

Maybe Jesus understood this definition of big hope. Jesus certainly understood about women and children dying during childbirth. He knew of the joys and pains of labor and delivery. So maybe he chose the metaphor of childbirth because it couples hope with cautious anxiety. And maybe Jesus knew that human hope is often met with human fear…

 

Dear God: Help us to hold to hope even when it is coupled with anxiety and fear. May feelings of expectation and longing guide us through our days and may those feelings push us through even the darkest times. For you ARE hope and ultimately you have overcome all fear. Amen.