Random Tear Shedding

If we’re ever talking in-person and my eyes suddenly fill with tears, it doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m emotional; it’s just something that my eyes do!

 

It happened yesterday at church while talking about an upcoming lake trip. I was talking to my choir director, telling her that I wouldn’t be at church one Sunday, when suddenly my eyes filled with tears. I wasn’t sad. Yet there I was with tears filling my eyes, very conscious of the fact that my choir director was probably wondering why I was so emotionally invested in the conversation.

 

What can I say? My eyes like to cry! Sometimes for no reason…but sometimes for good reason as well.

 

Like a moment of conviction during the prayer of confession:

 

“We have sinned against you….by what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.”

 

Over the past several years, I have been learning to treat myself with grace, patience, and compassion. I have been learning not to judge myself so harshly and always to leave room for growth. Yesterday, I was convicted that my “neighbors,” amongst others, are my students. And if I am to love my students as I love myself, then I must treat them—even the most annoying of them—with grace, patience, and compassion, and with the belief that there is always room for growth.

 

Or a moment of frustration during the New Testament reading:

 

“…Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to care for the orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.” James 1:27

 

What is it going to take for the “religious” to realize that our faith in action is not solely about individual moral perfection and judgment but about living in community and taking care of one another, especially the least of these, with words, deed, and action?

 

Or a moment of humility during the prayers of the people:

 

“We pray for this congregation, especially those beginning a new school year. Empower teachers, staff, and school administrators. Guide students in their learning and development.”

 

There are people all across the country praying for me, as a teacher, and for my students. How humbling is that? Even as I write this, my eyes are filled with tears again.

 

But, yes. If we’re talking in person and my eyes suddenly fill with tears, it doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m emotional; it’s just something that my eyes do! And even if we ARE talking about something emotional and I begin to cry, don’t worry: You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just me being me. And I’m learning that that is okay. And it’s okay for my neighbor, too.

 

God: Thank you for loving us as we are, random tear-shedding and all. And thank you for the conviction, frustration, and humility that truly move us. Amen.