FreeCell

A couple of weeks ago, I had the strangest conversation with myself.

“I’d like to play FreeCell,” I thought.

“FreeCell?!” I responded.

“You haven’t played FreeCell in years!”

“I know. But I’d really like to play.”

I didn’t play that day. Or the next. Or the next.

But as thoughts of FreeCell continued to enter my mind, I finally gave in to the thoughts and downloaded a FreeCell App.

The last time I’d played FreeCell was when it came pre-installed on my computer!!

Since the download, I have played around 20 games.

I’ve noticed that I hold my breath while I’m playing because I get so anxious about my moves.

I try not to use hints, but sometimes I do.

I try not to use undo, but sometimes I do.

Sometimes I win. Sometimes I lose. But my reactions are always the same:

I feel very sad when I lose—disappointed and let down.

But then I feel a huge sense of accomplishment when I win—especially when I’ve caught myself thinking, “This is impossible. I’m going to lose.” The little card dance at the end of the game is truly a celebration! I begin to breathe again. And I smile while I release a little cheer.

I told a friend about my newfound FreeCell hobby. She said, “Your life is getting ready to become very hectic and stressful. You FreeCell all you want.”

I think I will.

I think I’ll continue my quest to be present right now—with whatever my thoughts bring up.

The stress of school (or whatever “school” is to you) is coming soon enough. For some, it’s already here.

So for now, and even then, let’s find joy every way we can…simple (well, not so simple 😊) victories included.