Shoes and Toiletries

 

Before leaving for Belize,

I bought a lot of new things:

New shorts, 

New tank tops,

New pants,

New sunhat, 

New shoes, 

New cooling towels,

New passport holder, 

New toiletries. 

 

When it came time to leave,

I was presented with the option to leave what I no longer needed so that it could be distributed amongst the members of the community. 

 

There was no question that I would leave my new Birkenstock tennis shoes. 

They were very nice, 

But I wasn’t going to wear them.

Why should I bring them home to America when someone there could use them? 

 

There was no question that I would leave all of the new remaining toiletries. 

I had duplicates of most of them at home and what I didn’t have was easily replaced. 

 

There was no question that I would leave sunhat. 

Someone requested it point blank. 

 

There was no question that I wouldn’t leave my clothes. 

They were ragged tie dyed shirts or paint stained shorts. 

No one would want to wear those. 

 

But there was a question about my work shoes. 

Why I made it a question is beyond me. 

I stood in the room and debated if I should leave my new Crocs or if I should bring them home, 

Knowing good and well that I had plenty of other shoes at home 

And that the Crocs would be better served in Belize. 

But what if I paint again?

Or do construction again?

I might need them, I justified. 

But then I thought 

No.

I don’t need them. 

I can easily buy new shoes. 

But then I thought

But they have paint on them. 

Yes, I responded.

But that paint will come off. 

Leave the shoes. 

They belong here. 

So I left the shoes. 

And I have no regrets. 

 

I just hate that I debated the decision at all. 

 

Why do we want to hold on to things when we know we don’t need them?

Why do we have a hard time parting with stuff when we know that stuff is not the essence of life?

 

God, forgive us when we put our priorities in the wrong place and focus on the wrong things. 

Help us to balance our giving with our receiving and our buying with our giving away. 

And when we give, God, help it to be with a genuine heart—

One that seeks to build up rather than look down—

One that seeks freedom over chains that bind. 

 

Amen.